What is the proper way to close out your favorite blog series of 2020? We could do a year in review and just get lost in the pandemic, biased news, and elections. That just seems a little old hat, and this new year you deserve a new hat. But that would require much more effort than I want to spend on this blog today. So, this is probably the wrong tyme to write about the laziness and incompetence of the workforce. Because we are dealing with covid in our house right now, I am probably not in the right state of mind to discuss our healthcare problems. (pause for laughter, not for the covid, but for me ever finding the right state of mind for anything) Education is something we will be discussing at some point, just not today. So old hat it is, sorry if I got your hopes up. This week in honor of the upcoming season 3 of Cobra Kai, we will talk about the pansification of America. So, suck it up buttercup, your feelings do not exist in this blog. Some of you will get that reference.
For those of us who grew up believing that words could not cause harm in the way that sticks and stones do, we are lost. Believe me when I say that I will attempt to keep the foul language to a minimum because it will be terribly hard for me to do so. I say that because this cancel culture we a letting happen is complete fucking bullshit. I am not going to list all words that are deemed offensive nowadays, but here a few words and phrases just for shits and giggles: picnic, crazy, moron, long tyme no see, gyp, and on and on and on. Here is one that is a stretch, “low hanging fruit”. Well according to one moron, anything that hangs can be associated with lynching. I will say that anything meant to suggest lynching is offensive, but that lynching cannot encompass all things hanging. How much taxpayer dollars did the FBI spend to investigate a pull rope in a NASCAR garage? There needs to be common sense when it pertains to offensiveness.
We need Johnny Lawrence’s Cobra Kai right now. We need someone to teach America not to get all butt hurt evertyme they see or hear something that goes against their beliefs. A couple years ago a football team owner said of the player’s so-called National Anthem protest, “It’s as if the prisoners were running the prison.” A player responded, “Now they calling us prisoners.” It’s called an analogy, you idiot. If you would read anything other than a bill from the strip club, you might learn something about it. Or when that pansy Chuck Todd (more about that waste of space when we get to the media blog) said, “I am horrified by what Trump just said. He said there are good Nazis.” Horrified! Really? First, he didn’t say it, I watched that press conference. Secondly, Nazis in the 1930s and '40s are scary. Today these neo-Nazi types are losers that should be lobotomized, not because they are horrific, but because they are fucking retarded. I know it may not be constitutional, but I would support a bill that would deem joining a Nazi organization illegal. In the tiny world of my blog, I am the law.
People need to learn what context means. Papa John lost his company because of the context. Words without context have no power and should not invoke the need for a safe space. What is wrong people! People have this strange and unnatural thought that their feelings should never be hurt in any way. As much as parents lyke to believe that their precious child is a butterfly or some other queer shit, they are not. We are stronger than we give each other credit for. The more we are coddled, the weaker we become. We have to be able to call each other out for our bullshit without having to walk on eggshells. We also must have the ability to bust each other’s balls without the PC Police knocking down our doors.
If we wanted to, we could find offensiveness in anything. We could claim that any use of water is offensive because 320,000 people drown every year. Even the most important living thing on earth, the bee, can be offensive since they kill 62 people a year. What about the New Orleans Saints, yep considering how many atheists and non-Christians there are in the world, the name Saints is insensitive. We could do this all day and before long we are going to be living in a society where everyone is walking around in drab clothes, art is outlawed, we will be forced to take pills to suppress feelings. I could tell you what you can do with a society lyke that, but I am approaching my foul language limit for this episode.
Years ago, some “genius” figured out a way to calculate society’s feelings. He worked at a newspaper and guessed that every letter sent to the paper represented some arbitrary number of people. If someone got their panties in a bunch about some article or advertisement, the paper would assume that pansy represented “x” amount of people. So, the paper would make a retraction or get rid of the ad, to appease “x” amount of people. Here is the problem, when do you call customer service? Do you call if everything is honkey dory? No, people mainly call customer service or write a letter when they are not happy about something. Unhappy people are disproportionately represented in our squeaky wheel gets the grease society. I am not suggesting people not complain or that their complaints should go unnoticed. When you are wronged, you should be allowed to voice it, but it should be considered an isolated instance until it is joined by many other instances.
Another fun example of that is the Washington Redskins. According to polls, between 70 and 90% of Indians do not believe the term redskin is offensive. It is the same thing with Eskimos. Natives of Canada and Alaska refer to themselves as Eskimos because Inuit is not part of their language. These terms along with hillbilly, coonass, and redneck are either embraced or considered demeaning. There is always some small percentage of people who find offense in any name. Labeling has become taboo. Good luck with gender labeling. For fu…….
Along with context, tone and delivery should help determine if a so-called inflammatory word is being abused. You can say “F” off ten different ways, and it means ten different things. The thing is when you hear it you know how it was meant to be used. The same can be said of racial slurs. Because you cannot hear my tone in this writing, I will not write them out, but you know the intent of these words when they are spoken. When someone says a racial or sexual oriented word, it is easy to determine if it was meant to aggressive or not. Being able to understand that, will either justify or vilify a physical retaliation. And yes, I believe that if you intend to hurt someone with your words, you should also brace yourself for an ass-whooping.
We also have a major problem with not understanding how words and symbols evolve. Words and phrases that represented ill-treatment years ago, has changed over tyme and now mean something much less vile. "Rule of thumb" has a horrible origin, but now it has evolved into something altogether different. The same can be said for "fag". While I'm at it, I think "cunt" is brilliantly used by our British brothers, as it is not used in a gender-specific way. I hate to keep bringing up Nazis, but we should discuss an exception, the swastika. The swastika was a symbol of good luck and spirituality for centuries, then Hitler tilted it, and now it is a reminder that there is evil among us. The lesson is that words and symbols can change over tyme.
A good way to close out this blog is to tell you what offends me. Right now, it is student loan forgiveness. When I hear politicians discuss student loan forgiveness, all I hear is fuck you, veterans. I made a four-year sacrifice and a $1,800 investment to this country, in return for college, and they want to forgive student loans to idiots, that couldn’t do simple math. Do not spend $200,000 on an education only to get a job that pays $40,000 a year. (More on this in the education episode) Maybe I am overly sensitive and am being a little bitch about this, I don’t care.
So, how do we fix it? There is only one answer and it comes from Sensei Lawrence, “Don’t be a pussy!” That’s a wrap for your favorite 2020 blog. I hope y’all have enjoyed it. Let us welcome in 2021 with cautious optimism. Remember Jimmy V’s 3 things, and stay golden, all you Pony Boys and Gals. Happy New Year!